contended

hey people.
i know its the first day back to school after a short breaqk for CNY.
hows school?
i guess stressed up and moodless yea?
thats what i see from fb and twitter.
everyone complaining about exams coming and still in that CNY holiday mood.
comon people jiayous.
last lap alr !
endure for 2-3more weeks and its holidays! :D
yesyes,ivyng needs to get her exam mood too alr!
and needs to start exercising!
okays, i know action speaks louder than words!
so stop being LAZY AND GET MOVING IVY NG! :/
anyway had 2hr lesson in school today.
went yishun and visit ERIC TAN THAT IDIOT!
baby came for awhile too .
thanks baby for spending time with me (:
i know we have been argue-ing alot these days.
i know i have asked too much from you,.
i know its all my childishness and insecurities that is killing us.
i know you are trying very hard alr.
i know i need to be contended.
do you know how afraid i am ?
im afraid that you will leave like how the others did.
im afraid that when you got enlisted things changed and we changed.
im afraid that i've got no much time for you.
espcially this month, im so gonna get studying and busy with my exams.
yet you gonna get enlisted soon...
i wanna spend time with you, cherish the time we got.
im stressed up with everything.
emotionally stress. really.
yet everytime i have to pretend im alright.
i wanted to rant so much to you.
but everytime i got scolded/nagged by you instead.
sometimes im alr very hurt but the words you said make me even worst.
its like i know you meant well, you want me to uds things.
but you know, im just a girl .
how much can i take ?
sometimes, i just want you to hug me and tell everything its okays, because you are here for me.
but at times, i held back thinking should i tell you things or not ?
because you always make me feel like everything is my fault.
its like everything ive done will never be right , never.
im sorry that i love you, im sorry that i got us into this, im sorry that its tedious to be with me, im sorry that im acting like a kid, im sorry that all my insecurities&sesitiveness brought us so many unhappiness.
but hang on boy, because i will get better.
for you, for myself.
i love you,baby :)


have been crying alot lately, almost everyday.
i dunno whats wrong.
i got upset over lil things .
too emotionally.
i miss how i used to be.
this is not me.
hangon ivyng.
you can do better than this.
my dear friends that have been pretty upset lately too.
cheerup.
it will not rain forever.
BP right? :)
jiayous people !
goodnights . (:
xoxo.